This is the beginning of something, I just know it.
There is so much to say, so much to do. Everything is happening so quickly, now, and I just have to get it all down so that this all makes sense to whomever decides to spend time reading.
Here’s the story thus far… Ever since middle school, I’ve been a “revolutionary”. And by “revolutionary,” I mean to say that I bitched and moaned, critiqued the lifestyles of the rich around me, and listened to bands that ragged on world leaders. I wore a lot of black and taught myself how to make Molotov Cocktails. Grand, right? I spent a lot of time reading Emma Goldman and Che Guevara and became an official anarchist in eighth grade.
I was a bit ahead of myself, being the arrogant little punk I evolved into. (I’m not saying that anarchism is a bad idea [I think it's a grand ideal], but I was misinformed in many ways. Not saying that Goldman or Guevara were bad sources for knowledge, but that I didn’t do enough solid research.) Most of my ideas came from punk songs. Not always a great idea, especially when lyrics are “fuck the system, let’s get drunk/high!” That’s apathy [as you hopefully know], people.
As high school began, my ideas were thrown around and challenged by the few anarchists and other politically-involved and/or motivated youths. I fought back with my limited views and came out victorious occasionally. Unfortunately, I knew that inside none of what I was saying was what I wanted my views to be. I always felt wrong. It was as if my opinions were wrong but I struggled to keep them… (Sometimes I still wonder about those three years. But that’s beside the point…) People around me were dressing minimally and caring about the little, intangible things that I wanted to care about, but for some reason I was not on their plane of thought [yet].
Everything changed this summer. I had been going to summer [“hippie”] camp and spending four weeks in the middle of nowhere, indulging in nature and having fun without worrying about anything; however, I met the age limit for campers last summer and would have had to be a counselor in order to return to Echo Hill this summer. I applied but didn’t get asked back, so I was left without summer plans. My parents wanted me to do an academic summer program for once, and tried to loop me into the University of Iowa Creative Writer’s Studio. I didn’t want to, and half-assed the application and such.
I didn’t get in. Mom and Dad freaked, to say the least. SO, I scrambled about, searching for another summer writing program.
I stumbled upon the Summer Writing Program at Carleton College. I had heard very few things about Carleton, but knew it was a good school and that I could always apply there and see what would happen. I got into the Carleton program in the spring, and waited anxiously to go.
Though I was excited to go and improve my writing, I never realized how great of a summer I would have and how much I would learn. So many of the people I met were so much more authentic as individuals as I was. They taught me things about life and love and friendship, literature and coffee, drugs, sex, and alcohol, and everything I’ve ever wondered about: death, divorce, sleep, money, the world, the environment… we talked about everything and anything and it was the most amazing time I’ve ever spent in an academic environment. The people who I lived with, dined with, and bitched with; the kids I smoked with, danced with, chalked with, and even discussed readings with were individuals who loved learning and ideas and were passionate about life and things.
For once, I was surrounded by people who didn’t just “hang out” and mill about, just being. The kids at Carleton SWP 2007 wanted to do things with their lives; they wanted to change the world. I fell in love harder than I’d ever fallen before, and now I know that there are so many feelings and real emotions in me that I can never be robotic and “normal” again.
Carleton SWP 2007 changed so much for me. Coming home was the most disillusioning feeling in the world. I cried for days [and even now I cry because I miss my contemporaries so much]. So much has changed in me, and SWP had so much to do with it. I read so much more, thought so much more, and learned to understand who I truly wanted to be and how to get there. I’ve got my old values, but now I can actually say that I support everything I say. I’m through with being a hypocrite.
And that’s where the story has paused. But if it was really paused, forward movement wouldn’t be happening. Which would be far from the truth.
So what’s the point in me making a blog? How does this play into the forward march I am making?
There are so many reasons. In the last few days of SWP, I decided that I needed to share the wonder of becoming my own revolution with the world: starting a grassroots revolution in my own hometown of Suburbia, Midwest is what I plan to do. Actually, it’s more than a plan. Plans can be broken and/or watered down. That’s not what I want for this. I’ve worked too hard and struggled too much to let this be something so milquetoast.
This is my crusade against hypocrisy, apathy, and ignorance. Against arrogance, conformity, and everything in-between that hurts the human spirit and our society.
Here begins the revolution. If you want to feel something real, if you want to become something real, or you support being your own human being and repairing society, you’ve found the right blog. Let’s do something. Better yet, let’s do somethings. You can never just do one thing.
My goal is to present information that is as unbiased as possible. I do not endorse political parties, and I consider myself a radical rather than a liberal or conservative. That kind of label is just another affiliation that weighs down the individual. I do not want to fight politics in the traditional two-party war. My purpose is to help people see the little things they can do to create a snowball of change. I bring you the beauty of awareness.
My friends, I bring you the most humanly objective truth available. There is no special benefit for me, so why would I deceive you with spin and slander? I don’t want to be deceptive; there is too much deception in our society already. I want to change things for the better.
I know I’m not alone in wanting this.
Love always,
Lizzy
